A Prisoner By Choice?

Go with me for a moment to a place that will hurt. Think for just a moment about the person in your life that makes you cringe. The one you don’t want to think about. I’m sorry I’m making you go there right now, I understand it’s hard. What are you feeling right now? Hurt, broken, sorrow, pain, anger, confusion, hate? 

prisoner-hands

This person that hurt you, the one that never asked for forgiveness, continues to hurt you time and time again. Except, they only had to act it out one time. Maybe they aren’t even in your life anymore? Maybe you haven’t seen them in years? Why is it that the pain still feels so real? Why does it feel as if a knife is stabbing at your heart? 

This person gets to go about life and seem pretty well off. Maybe they are truly evil and have no remorse for how they hurt you. So why do they get to go about life while we are stuck feeling broken and hurt? 

Why do we keep ourselves locked up in a prison when someone else hurts us? We tell ourselves that by staying mad at them, we hold the power over the relationship. But it is so false. Forgiveness is the only way to overcome this pain. Even if they never ask for forgiveness, give it to them anyway. Let go of the anger and bitterness. Let go of the hurt and the pain. 

One of the biggest lies we tell ourselves is that we can’t forgive someone because what they did was unforgivable. But only after we have truly forgiven someone are we able to start becoming whole again. We are able to find healing. There is nothing that can’t be forgiven.

prisonjailcellopendoor1

Don’t ever let someone take away your happiness. That’s not theirs to take! When we choose to not forgive we are also choosing to feel the pain. We are choosing to be their prisoner–and they don’t even know it. 

Friends, forgiveness does not mean you are saying what happened was okay. It wasn’t okay. It was so so wrong. You didn’t deserve it. But, you also don’t deserve to continue hurting because of it. 

chains

Let go of the chains that you have been holding onto for so long. You can do it! It helps to talk to someone about it and I would be honored to be that person. Here is to a life of forgiveness and freedom! 

 

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38 Responses to A Prisoner By Choice?

  1. beingeternal says:

    Speechless! This is the same mire in which my feet are stuck. It is a painful path leading to painless soul. Hatred, grudge, revenge are few things which are like fireballs. We hold these to throw at them but we end up burning our own fingers holding fireballs in our hands…………………….

    Liked by 1 person

    • lightthelie says:

      I couldn’t have said it better myself. I too have been there, but there is a light on the other side. Giving forgiveness felt like a literal weight was lifted. Amazing freedom 🙂 wishing that for you as well!!

      Like

  2. beingeternal says:

    Thank you very much dear. Hope being free.:)

    Like

    • lightthelie says:

      Thanks for chatting! I’ve learned that sometimes forgiveness is a choice you have to make time and time again as memories resurface… If it were only easier!

      Like

      • beingeternal says:

        Yes, it is a damn recurring choice. We forgive in this moment but relive the hurt ever after. I wonder how we forgive and and seek forgiveness if the pain resurfaces eternally……………..

        Like

      • lightthelie says:

        So true! I just hope that the choice will become easier to make each time until it’s no big deal. Maybe someday the memory will be more of a reflection and not painful. Bitterness and anger turn me into someone I’m not and I hate it! And that’s what I try to remind myself when those memories resurface. Have you been working at it awhile?

        Liked by 1 person

      • beingeternal says:

        Yes….. tiring five years.

        As you said, bitterness makes me someone else’s version and dents my first rate version, a humble and generous one. I have always forgiven however hurt I was. but my constant forgiving of others has ended me in a niche where my offenders have take it for granted.

        Like

      • lightthelie says:

        I’m so sorry they have taken advantage of you. You seem amazing and absolutely don’t deserve that. If it is abuse, I would argue to forgive them from a distance. But if it’s not then I would hope someday they’ll realize the pain they’ve put you through. Here’s to being the first rate version of ourselves! Thank you for the encouragement this morning. Today I choose forgiveness, will you choose it with me? 🙂

        Like

      • beingeternal says:

        Sure dear ……………. for the sake of liberation. I thank you for your kindness and values. Love and blessings. 🙂

        Like

      • lightthelie says:

        🙂 please stop by often!! I will do the same with your posts. Love and blessings to you as well.

        Like

      • beingeternal says:

        Sure! I noticed your presence on my blog so was curious to know about. I like your blog stuff. so being aware to read each and every thing whenever permitted. I guess…………. i am your follower too. 🙂

        Like

      • lightthelie says:

        I was going to comment here.. But I’ll go leave it on your blog!

        Liked by 1 person

  3. jisbell22 says:

    This is another AMAZING post! You stated this concept beautifully with a great and deep understanding. You are truly a very talented writer. I love everything you write! Thank you

    Liked by 2 people

    • lightthelie says:

      Wow, thank you so much! Every bit of encouragement goes such a long way. I never saw myself as a writer, so writing has been quite a journey for me! I am blown away by the kindness you have shared here. I pray you will continue to reach forgiveness, since I know sometimes it can be a daily choice! But one day we will be completely healed once again, amen!

      Like

      • jisbell22 says:

        Absolutely we will reach the fulness of true forgiveness. I think we can all become better in this and as we do so, teach others along the way. Through the small and simple steps, many lives can be improved and changed as we all learn the incredible healing power that is forgiveness. You have done incredibly well with your gift of writing. Your posts inspire me to improve upon my own writing as they are so full of truth and wisdom. I hope you are ok that I took the liberty to reblog this post.

        Liked by 1 person

      • lightthelie says:

        We can learn so much from each other. Thank you for sharing how these posts have impacted you. When we understand the power of forgiveness it is a lot easier to give it! And understanding that we don’t need an apology to forgive someone. That is the part most will have to struggle with. As children we are taught it’s more of a cause-effect situation. When really we are free to give forgiveness wether the other party asks for it or not. I appreciate the feedback greatly!!

        Liked by 1 person

      • jisbell22 says:

        It is truly refreshing to discuss this with you. We are taught as children many things and while well intentioned, they create confusion as an adult. Another future post! lol

        Liked by 1 person

      • lightthelie says:

        Absolutely! I can’t wait to read this future post. A lot of life’s problems start off with good intentions.. haha. Sad, but true. Blessings to you and your family today!

        Liked by 1 person

      • jisbell22 says:

        Thank you! You too! We are off to Wyoming to watch my 10 year old nephews football game

        Liked by 1 person

  4. jisbell22 says:

    Reblogged this on jisbell22 and commented:
    This is an amazing article, full of truth and wisdom I highly recommend it

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Andy Oldham says:

    What a beautiful post! Thanks for this song! Blessings to you!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. happyface313 says:

    🙂 You are so so so so right! 🙂
    Thanks for putting it in words! I needed that just now 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • lightthelie says:

      Thank you so much!! And absolutely. Forgiveness is tough and we should definitely talk about it more often and encourage one another daily 🙂 Here’s to being free and happy!! Thanks happyface for the comment. Love the name by the way!!

      Like

  7. Bettina says:

    First time I visit your blog! I loved it, love the way you write and inspire, the words are truly understood and I agree completely, in order to be free we must learn to forgive. I think that the hardest part of forgiving is to forgive ourselves.

    Liked by 1 person

    • lightthelie says:

      Thank you so much for your encouraging words 🙂 so glad you were able to find me so that I could find you! I couldn’t agree with you more. I often find that I am the toughest on myself. Setting the bar too high and not allowing myself any grace. I heard an awesome quote today “right actions in the future are the best apologies for wrong actions in the past.” Love it. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  8. DotedOn says:

    So beautifully written :). Thank you!

    Liked by 1 person

    • lightthelie says:

      Thank you so much for your encouraging words. 🙂 it was my pleasure to write this as I try to understand the true freedom we receive by forgiving. It’s the opposite of what feels natural-that’s for sure!

      Like

  9. charlie says:

    Thanks. May God bless you and make you a blessing to many.

    Like

  10. Pingback: You are not your Parent | Light The Lie

  11. Crystal says:

    Hello!
    Thank you for visiting my blog and liking a post! I’m really glad that I came to check out your site. This post about forgiveness came to me just at the right time.Thank you for reminding me that holding back forgiveness from someone hurts ME more than it does the other person. I look forward to reading more! 🙂
    Blessings,
    Crystal

    Like

    • lightthelie says:

      You have a beautiful blog Crystal! It was my pleasure to follow you. We all can use a reminder about forgiveness once in a while. It is one of the hardest things to do.. Maybe the hardest? Thank you for sharing! It warms my heart hearing how a post was able to encourage. It makes blogging worth it, so thank you! I look forward to reading more of your posts as well. ❤ Emily

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Pingback: 5 Misconceptions of Forgiveness | Light The Lie

  13. Pingback: Surviving Divorce as a Teenager | Light The Lie

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